Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Happy Endings and Rose Colored Glasses

Sometimes life just sucks.

Sometimes we get really really happy. Everything is working out exactly as you hoped. Work is going great, maybe you scored a freelance gig with M.A.C makeup, maybe your friend comes to visit you, you met a great guy and finally you think....wow, he might last longer than a week!

So things go well, you get excited.




And then......... BOOM. CRASH. EXPLOSION.

Life just flips you on your butt. In my case, it had nothing to do with me. But still a piece of my happiness was taken away. Maybe forever, maybe just for a little while. But that happy, got a smile on my face 24/7 feeling...it's not there as much.




Here is my advice when life gets you down. If you need to cry, then cry. If it seems like you can't stop crying, thats ok too. It is your heart's way of working things out. If you are like me, people don't get that close very often. I let people in, I just am wary. But sometimes, like now, I let those walls all the way down. ANd you know what? It was amazing. Yes, by lowering the walls I got hurt. But I don't regret it. Because I remember what it was like to feel HAPPY. To feel wanted, appreciated, adored. And even though it hurts, that feeling means more to me. So go ahead, cry it out. But don't lose hope. Remember what it is that you want and ask God for it. Go ahead, you deserve to ask! We might not always get exactly what we want, but maybe life can be a fairy tale. Maybe we deserve our happy endings. Maybe someday I will come home from a walk with my dog and he will be there, waiting for me to tell me he knows what he wants, that he wants me. Maybe that won't happen. Maybe it's not realistic. But I like my rose colored glasses. I like Hope. I like Faith. I want to see the world with positivity. There are enough Debbie Downers and Negvative Nancy's out there. I want to be Hopeful Helen. Because I think that happy endings are real. They happen every day. And I am more likely to get my happy ending with a positive attitude and hope in my heart.

I believe this. I hope you all do too.

I'm off to do a photoshoot now. Because I'm awesome.

Love to you all,

Amy

Monday, January 31, 2011

New Year, New Name, New Adventures!

Amelia St. John


Do you like the new name? I decided a name change was in order because Amy Frazier is SUPER common. Go ahead......google it right now! I will wait..................


See? Tons of websites dedicated to Amy Frazier the professional tennis player. And I was told recently that the last name "Frazier" was really common in Europe. Frazier in Europe is equivalent to Smith in USA. Might as well go by the name Jane Smith. In this industry, you need something unique. I've got the sweet, cute personality. But my name was forgettable. So Amelia St John is what I decided to go with. I chose "Amelia" because I can still reasonably go by the name "Amy" and St. John was just something that came to me as I was playing around with the way names sounded. I think Amelia St. John is classy and elegant. So there you have it. Forget Amy Frazier...she's just my legal name and the name on my credit cards and drivers license. Amelia St. John is who I am now and I am embracing it. Jump on the bandwagon or get off the ride!

I've still been busting my butt down here trying to make a place for myself in this world. It's difficult. But I'm perserving. I am lucky to have the unwavering support of my mom and my family. Without them I don't know if this would be possible. So quick shout out...thanks Mom!!

I did a Before and After on my mom....take a look

Before

After


(Thanks Mom...for letting me show your before and after photo. You are beautiful with no makeup on and your inner beauty shines brighter than any outer beauty so this makeover wasn't hard. You were already beautiful!)

I have a lot more before and afters, but if anyone wants to volunteer to be added, I am always open to more models!

Anyway, January is almost over, time for the month of love to begin! I'm very excited for February because my soul mate sister Meaghan O'Brien is coming to visit me from Boston! I have missed this girl so much and I talk to her everyday on the phone and over text messages. I can't wait to have her here for 6 days. We are going to go to The Makeup Show at the LA Convention Center over the weekend and then we are hopefully going to line up lots of photoshoots. Also One Day (http://www.one-day.biz/ <--- Seriously go and support this production. "Like" it on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=6417833#!/pages/One-Day/189199376245?v=wall) is going to still be filming and Meaghan is going to get the opportunity to help out the makeup department and get her first IMDB credit. Yay for that. And just YAY in general for working together! I would love to do some professional photos with her and I together. She can do my makeup and I can do hers and then we can find a photographer to shoot us. I'm no model...I prefer and am much more comfortable behind the camera lens. But I do want to get some good photos of myself and would love to have some with Meaghan, who does have professional modeling experience.

So if any photographers read this or if you know anyone who is a photographer who would maybe do a TF shoot...let me know! We are pretty much open to whatever (except Nudity...we don't do that)

Ok, I've had 75 cups of coffee and some yogurt. I'm pretty much all cracked out on coffee. I need to go do something physical to work off this energy! Yoga is out because I'm way too jittery for that. Maybe some running or some push ups...

Hope you all are well. And cross your fingers that it isn't another 2 months before a new blog post. Sorry y'all!

Hugs, massive cups of coffee and lots of energy,

Amelia